


Rudolph's Love

by Zoids-Fan



Category: Zoids
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2003-01-11
Updated: 2003-02-05
Packaged: 2013-05-11 00:16:19
Rating: T
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,309
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1172758/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/323722/Zoids-Fan
Summary: Yaoi, Rudolph/Van, nothing explicit. Set just after the blade liger has emerged, Rudolph's POV sort of





	1. Van! My Hero!

Inspired by "Miserable" by Tamazel, its a Rudolph x Van fic, hope you like it, and I look forward to reading and reviewing any Zoids fics you may have!  
  
  
  
  
  
Rudolph's Love  
  
  
  
After a lengthy period of despair and chaos, a new zoid has finally emerged from the strange light with Zeke and Fiona, the Blade Liger has been born!  
  
Here are the events that happened later that night that were cut out of the anime (Well ok, they weren't cut out, but one can dream ^_^ )  
  
***  
  
The Gustav rolled onward towards Guygalos as the sun started to set in the sky. Moonbay was singing again, and Fiona had timidly attempted to join in the singing with her in the front passenger seat. In the back was Van, Irvine, and Rudolph. Van was in the middle snoring away, as Irvine painfully tried to find something productive to do to distract himself from all the commotion.  
  
Rudolph was just sitting there, looking back at the events of the day in awe. This time yesterday he had been at the palace mourning the death of his father. Since then he had been kidnapped by bandits, discovered he was the target of an assassination, kidnapped again by an organoid, and been shot down in a Command Wolf. What an eventful day it had been! A tear almost formed in his eyes as he pictured the bandits, Russo and Viola, sacrificing themselves, and he prayed that somehow, some way they could have survived. One other thing had happened today, more important than everything else......he had met Van.  
  
Rudolph started to feel guilty, why was it that he was thinking about Van, more than Russo and Viola, the two people that had almost certainly died trying to protect him. He looked back at his first encounter with Van, the way he had been so scared when he saw the zoids approaching him, that he had hid himself in a bush. All of his fear had vanished the moment he saw Van for the first time, for some strange reason, unknown to him. Rudolph had been so busy examining his body from tip to toe, that he didn't notice the pebble that Van had just picked up. The pebble hit him, and he let out a cry of pain, blowing his cover. After that were some shaky introductions, Rudolph tried to keep his cool, last thing he wanted to do was let on about how attracted he was to his new friend, he was the crown prince after all. He had over done it a bit though, speaking so formally that everyone was clueless.  
  
As if it wasn't love at first sight already, Van had actually been very kind towards him in the hours following on from that, teaching him the basics of piloting a Zoid, and strengthening him up mentally. And here he was, sitting right next to him on the Gustav!  
  
Rudolph took a quick glance at Van, hoping nobody would notice. Van looked so innocent sleeping there like that. Feelings of desire welled up in Rudolph, he could barely contain himself, he wanted to pounce on Van there and then.....but no, that could never happen, the people in the Imperial Territory would never allow there to be an emperor who had a boyfriend. He pictured Prozen's face if such an event had occured and gone public. Anyway, what was he thinking, Van would never be interested in him, he was a boy, a boy who was pretty useless as well.  
  
He looked over at Fiona, and wished that somehow they could switch bodies. It would be so awesome, Van and himself could be a great couple, and Fiona would make an excellent emperor. He closed his eyes and tried to switch bodies, perhaps there was some trick with mind over matter. Of course, it didn't work. Rudolph sighed, but then remembered where he was, he was sitting next to Van!  
  
Taking advantage of the situation, he pretended to be asleep, and slowly snuggled up against him, so that the others would think it unintentional. As Rudolph's head lay on Van's chest, he could feel the gentle vibrations and humming caused by his breathing. He sounded so beautiful. Suddenly out of the blue, he felt an arm go over his shoulder, it was Van's! Rudolph questioned if Van was asleep when he had done this.  
  
------  
  
Not sure if I should end it there, what do you think? 


	2. Nothing Lasts Forever

Ahh wow, thanks for reading! Means a lot to me!  
  
Well, you convinced me to write some more :)  
  
Not my favorite chapter and a little short, so I'll probably make a third one and post it tomorrow...  
  
  
  
------  
  
A few hours later, the Gustav rolled over a bump in the road, waking both Rudolph and Van up. Rudolph was shocked that he had fallen asleep with his head on Van's chest, he was also amazed at how comfortable a sleep it was. He felt Van's arm suddenly lift off of him, and treasured the last few seconds he could before finally lifting his head. Moonbay, Irvine and Fiona were all staring at the two of them!  
  
"Looks like you two lovebirds have finally woken up!" Irvine smirked jokingly.  
  
"Very funny, Irrrvine!" Van responded, his facing turning red.  
  
"It's Ok Van, there is nothing wrong with that." Fiona added, a bit confused.  
  
"Aghgh, Fiona, its not like that!"  
  
At those words, Rudolph suddenly felt a little downhearted, and he felt a wave of depression lift over him. Somehow, those words seemed to have truth in them. He felt a chill down his spine, and felt like the emperor was looking down upon him and frowning, frowning at him for being attracted to Van. Two silhouettes were also alongside him in the shape of Russo and Viola.  
  
"Well?" Moonbay asked.  
  
"Well what?" Rudolph suddenly realized he had missed a chunk of conversation.  
  
"We head over to the Dune Colony and book us into a hotel?"  
  
"Uhmm, yeah sure"  
  
"Something the matter?" Van asked  
  
"Oh no....nothing" Yeah, it really was nothing, Rudolph began thinking, it was not like he would ever have a chance of being Van's boyfriend or something, what crazy thoughts! He may as well just enjoy the time they all have together whilst he still could. He began to smile.  
  
"Now that's more like it!" Van grinned looking into Rudolphs eyes. ".......Papayas! The markets may still be open!"  
  
"I am aaAA, TrAnSPorter, oF The WasTEla, VAN!!!" Moonbay swung around fuming at Van, who had been trying to crawl up front to get a good view of how close they were.  
  
"Wouldn't like to be you, Van" Irvine muttered.  
  
"Moonbay, look out!" Fiona screamed. 


	3. A Room For Two

Heeding Naomi's advice, I sort of consolidated 2 chapters into 1, I wonder if you can notice the point where the chapters would have been split apart hehe.  
  
Anyways, here's Chapter 3, should be a lot better than Chapter 2. I hope you enjoy it, and thanks again for reading, makes it all worthwhile!  
  
  
  
------  
  
Moonbay swung back round to see a huge, abandoned Geysac directly in front of them, it had been on the other side of the dune that they were going over, and so Moonbay had not noticed it earlier. She made a sharp turn, and narrowly avoided it.  
  
Van, out of his seat, toppled backwards from the turn falling onto Irvine, who cringed in displeasure, and felt particularly distraught about where Van's elbow had made impact upon him. Rudolph had been hoping that Van would have toppled onto him, but had quickly changed his mind.  
  
"Ooo, thats gotta hurt, Irvine" Moonbay sympathized.  
  
"Please don't turn around any more, Moonbay" Fiona appealed.  
  
"Geroofff off of me, Van" came the faint high-pitched sounds from Irvine's mouth, his eye piece dangling from his ear.  
  
"I'm having a little trouble getting up."  
  
"VaAAan!"  
  
With help from Rudolph, Van found his own seat at last. "I'm sorry Irvine, I didn't mean to...." He suddenly realized why Irvine was so mad. "Oohhh.....oopsie, heh say Rudolph, would you like to erm swap seats?" Van was genuinely scared.  
  
"No need for that Van, we've arrived!" Fiona chirped, calming the atmosphere. They had indeed arrived, and the Gustav slowed to a stop. Van opened the top of the Gustav and leaped over Rudolph, making himself scarce, and also to find some papayas.  
  
Moonbay, Fiona and Irvine also left the Gustav, leaving Rudolph all alone, it was like they had forgotten that he had even existed.  
  
"Ruuudolph!" Fiona called out. So much for that silly thought, he chuckled to himself, as he got out.  
  
Dune Colony was a fairly small place, which held a flock of old farmers who hadn't even heard of the Emperor's death. They decided to leave Zeke behind so he could get used to the extra functions of the new Blade Liger, and also because they didn't want to startle the residents.  
  
The moment they had entered the Colony, they were greeted by a farmer. They explained their situation, and the farmer gave a set of keys to Fiona. He told them that they were for Farmer Jack's house who had sadly passed away, and since the place was vacant, they could stay there for the night. An old lady appeared beside him, and they skipped away together.  
  
"That was weird," stated Fiona  
  
"I wonder if that is normal around here," added Rudolph  
  
A few minutes later, Van reappeared with a few papaya's, and Irvine glared in his direction. "I think I'm going to sleep by the Command Wolf tonight." He walked off before anyone could say anything to him.  
  
Rudolph wondered if...  
  
After a short walk they arrived at the house, it looked more like an old shack that was on it's last legs. Inside though, it seemed quite different, homely.  
  
"If you'll excuse us, boys, I think I'm going to hit the sack, and would like some privacy." Moonbay uttered, prodding them towards the staircase.  
  
"Looks like its just gonna be you and me tonight, bud." Van said warmly, as they plodded carefully up the stairs leaving Fiona with Moonbay. Rudolph couldn't believe what was happening, it was just going to be him and Van, all alone, who knows what could happen.  
  
As Rudolph reached the top of the stairs, he noticed two rooms, one was a bathroom, the other was a bedroom. They entered the bedroom, and were surprised to see how nice it looked. Rudolph would never have believed this was the same place that he saw from the outside. Added to that surprise was the fact, that the walls, ceiling and floor were all pink in color. There was also a double bed, which was a deep sea blue and seemed very inviting when put in contrast to the pink.  
  
"Wow, I feel really out of place up here," said Van. "Perhaps we should switch with the girls." He walked over to the landing, stopped for a few seconds, and turned back. "Well, I guess it's not so bad up here."  
  
"At least we'll be safe here, Van."  
  
"Yeah, thats right, don't worry Rudolph, we'll have you back at Guygalos in no time." He put his hand on Rudolph's shoulder. "...........Been a while since I cleaned myself up, think I'll take a quick shower." He walked off through the landing and into the bathroom.  
  
Oh Van, the more I am around you, the more I want to be with you. Every time you touch me, I suddenly feel warm inside, its like you can dissipate all of my hurt with your touch. And when you look into my eyes, I feel like the most luckiest boy in the world, the most happiest. I am so in love with you Van, but I don't know what to do, I can't tell any of this to you, you wouldn't want anything to do with me if I did, and then there's the empire, if they find out about this I'm finished, and Prozen, noo.  
  
This, the thoughts going through Rudolph. He realized where he was, and that he would probably never be this close to Van like this again. His mind was tangled, if he was going to make a move, it would have to be tonight, and this made Rudolph's heart thump with fear and anxiety. The more he thought, the more everything else in the world didn't seem to matter anymore, Van was all he wanted, and so Rudolph decided that he would take that chance, put it all on the line, it was Van or nothing.  
  
He walked out of the bedroom and across the landing towards the bathroom. He stood outside the door and gasped for breaths, he could hear Van humming a pleasant tune as water showered onto the floor. Summoning all his courage, he reached for the door knob, what was he doing, was he just going to walk in and go up to Van? He paused, with his hand on the door knob. As much as he tried, he just could not bring himself to open the door. He tried to concentrate all of his will-power on opening the door, but his hand would not turn. Just then, he noticed a keyhole, sheesh, the door had probably been locked the whole time. Whether it had been locked or not, Rudolph decided on another plan, to look through the keyhole. One step at a time, he told himself as he squatted to the floor, and looked through.  
  
It was a difficult angle, but he could see Van's head, under the shower, and was shocked at how close he was to him, so close that his head was the only thing in view. He must have only been a few metres away. Wow, Van looked even cuter when his hair was wet. Rising up a little bit, Rudolph watched the water cascade down his face, and onto his smooth chest. Rudolph had never seen Van bare-chested before, and now felt like his eye was glued to the keyhole, like he couldn't look away even if he wanted to. He felt his heart racing, as he looked on. Van seemed to be perfect in every way, muscular but not over muscular, a gentle tan, and a cute belly-button. He moved his eyes to a higher position, watching the water trickle down his chest towards....  
  
Suddenly, a voice called out from behind him, "Hey Rudolph, what are you doing?!" It was Moonbay! 


	4. Can't Stop Thinking Of You

Wow, lots of nice reviews, makes me really happy. Thank You!  
  
Oh yeah, I finally remembered the disclaimer: ......I do not own Zoids  
  
Here's Chapter 4:  
  
------  
  
Moonbay stood with her hands on her hips, "Well, are you going to answer me?"  
  
Rudolph turned around startled and looked into Moonbay's sharp eyes. He felt like he was frozen to the spot, as if he was trapped in a block of ice. Trapped and about to suffocate. Think fast, he told himself, but nothing came to his head. "Well, you see, I was just.....well it's not like I was..."  
  
"Say, thats the bathroom." Her voice changed tone. "Don't tell me Van's in there! Can't a girl freshen up before she goes to sleep." She marched over to the door and struck it a couple of times. "Hey Van! How long are you going to be in there?!"  
  
"Hold on a while." A faint reply  
  
"Awwgh, Van! I only want to go in there for a minute, and I'm really tired, just wrap yourself in a towel and let me in."  
  
"No way!"  
  
"Come on Van!.......Van?..... Fine, be that way!" She stormed off down the stairs, but suddenly stopped when she was half way, and turned around. Rudolph felt her gaze fall upon him, but he dared not risk making eye contact. Pretending not to notice her, he slipped off into the bedroom.  
  
What was he going to do now? Was Moonbay onto him? Perhaps she was clueless, but still, best to think up some excuse in case she asks again. He thought long and hard for a few minutes, and decided that he went to the bathroom door to ask Van if he could eat one of his papayas, but he tripped up on the way, and that was why he was huddled over by the door. Comfortable with his 'alibi', Rudolph fell back onto the bed, and pictured Van once more. What was he doing thinking about Van, surely this wasn't normal, how come he had never felt like this about Marianne, the girl he had known virtually all of his life, and was supposed to get married to. He chuckled to himself as he pictured one of Van's goofy expressions. "Van."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Van!" A shocked reply  
  
"Whats wrong?" Van stood over him drying his hair with a towel.  
  
".........err....ermm...don't you ever change those clothes?"  
  
"Heh, you know carrying extra clothes takes a lot of effort, it's not like the Blade Liger has a closet, and plus there would be the laundry. I'm not too keen on doing that. Luckily Fiona isn't familiar with washing clothes, so don't tell her about it, ok?"  
  
"I hear you Van." Rudolph winked, as they both heard Moonbay emerge from the bathroom, and deliberately stomp across the landing. "I guess I could use a shower too." He got up and walked towards the door.  
  
"Hey Rudolph!"  
  
"Yes?!"  
  
"You might need this." Van tossed the towel towards him and it hit him squarely in the face.  
  
"Gee, thanks Van!"  
  
"Hahaha, anytime."  
  
With that, Rudolph entered the bathroom. Wow, a quick conversation with Van, and he felt like he was on top of the world again. Rudolph let out a sigh of happiness and turned on the tap. He stepped under the shower and let the water run over his head. What a relief it was to be out of that Royal attire, and even more so to be getting clean once again. Thoughts entered into his head, he tried to stop them, but it wasn't long before he gave in. He imagined Van entering and slowly walking up to him, he himself pretending to be angry by the intrusion as to not give his real feelings away, but much to his delight, Van kept getting closer and closer to him. His thoughts were interrupted by a commotion outside. It sounded like Van and Fiona.  
  
"No Fiona, its not like that!" These were the only words he could make out, words that were coming from Van. Could it be that Van had been spying on him? Rudolph flashed back to the last time Van had said those words, it was inside the Gustav, after he had just woken up. Was there some connection? Darn, this was all so frustrating, if only he knew how Van felt, he wouldn't have to keep asking himself all these questions, if only there was a way.  
  
A loud rumbling noise startled him, it seemed to be coming from outside. The noise was followed by a scream, what was going on? All sorts of different sounds and voices could be heard by the others, and then silence. Not a sound to be heard. An uneasy feeling crept over him as he turned off the tap. After a few seconds of wondering what to do, he wrapped the towel around his waist and opened the door a little. Nothing. He ventured out onto the landing. "Van? ......Where are you Van? ........Fiona? .......Anyone?. The bedroom was empty, the downstairs was empty, the whole house was empty. There must be something going on outside, why now? Rudolph told himself. Tonight was the perfect, and perhaps only chance to tell Van how I felt. When else could we be alone. Suddenly an overwhelming fear crept over him, that he may not even see him again. Maybe Van will get killed with whatever is happening outside or perhaps he already is dead. 


	5. Now Or Never

Sometimes I wonder just why am I writing this fic.....well I guess it doesn't really matter now, cos this is the last chapter! ^_^  
  
I know this story is supposed to be solely around Rudolph, but I could help sneaking in a little extra scene.  
  
Anyways, Thanks for reading my fic, its been fun, and I hope you enjoy :)  
  
------  
  
Was Van alive? Rudolph needed to know, and he needed to know now. He walked over to the front door and opened it a crack, looking out, he could see five or six people about fifty yards away looking at the house opposite. What were they looking at, a bush was blocking his view. Moving outside a few steps he was relieved to notice Van, Fiona and Moonbay were amongst the growing crowd of spectators, they had been directly behind the bush. There were some voices across the street, someone was shouting but he couldn't see who.  
  
"You get away from me, get away! Fiends like you should be locked up!" It sounded like one of the old farmers.  
  
Rudolph couldn't hear what the other one was saying, but the voice sounded strangely familiar. It was somewhat mellow, feminine in a manly sort of way. The voice got louder, it seemed to be heading towards the crowd.  
  
"Well if it isn't Van Flyheight," the voice said, it seemed as if the person was as drunk as a skunk.  
  
"What are you doing here, Stinger?" Van responded.  
  
"Simple Van, I, hic, heard you were in a fanfic, and well I just had to join in the fun"  
  
"In a fanfic, what do you mean?" Fiona questioned.  
  
"Don't listen to him Fiona, he's just trying to get into your head."  
  
"hic, HICcup...As if I want to get into her head, I only have eyes for you Van." He staggered over towards him.  
  
"Don't come another step closer."  
  
"Ohh, but Van, you look sshoo ssssexy." Stinger continued walking towards him, and raised one of his arms to touch Van's face, but Van ducked out of the way. "What'ss the matter hic Van, I see it in you eyes, your attracted to guysies just like me."  
  
Rudolph looked on incredulously,  
  
"It's ok Van, you don't have to be ashamed of who you are."  
  
"AghHHhh Fiona! How many times do I have to tell you, I don't swing that way!"  
  
"Sw...swing what way?"  
  
"Never mind Fiona, just never mind."  
  
Stinger started up again. "You should listen to Fiona, nothing to be assshamed of Van, so how about it, you and me?" Rudolph could see frustration building up in Van, it was like Stinger had been pushing all the right buttons to make Van angry. Perhaps that was the motive, or perhaps he really wanted Van and was being truthful when he said what he was seeing in Van's eyes. As Rudolph contemplated this, he looked on as Van curled his fingers up into a fist, one more push and that would be it. He looked over to Stinger, how strange, he didn't seem to even be paying attention to Van anymore. In fact, he was looking directly this way....  
  
"Awwww, look at the little Prince Rudolph wearing nothing but a towel!" He suddenly yelled out in excitement. Rudolph's face turned bright red, as the crowd of onlookers all turned in his direction. He had been so caught up in the conversation between Van and Stinger, he had completely forgotten what he was wearing.  
  
"E...everything...ok Rudolph?" Van asked him, perplexed. Rudolph looked at all the different people in the crowd, all with their eyes fixed on him, and then he stared into Van's eyes. They were like a magnet, so difficult to look away. "Ruuudolph, anyone home in there?" Rudolph sighed listening to Van's voice, such a cute voice, he could listen to it forever.  
  
"Don't worry Van, I'll take him inside, he seems to be in a state of shock." Fiona stated, putting an arm around Rudolph's shoulder.  
  
As she led him back into the house, Rudolph mumbled something, and Fiona could just make out the words: "I'm not in shock, I'm in love." She gasped, and briskly walked into the house, so no one would see her shocked expression.  
  
As the door shut behind them, the sound of it made Rudolph more aware of his surroundings. He looked to his side to see Fiona. From her face it seemed like something was on her mind, like she wanted to ask him something; and he had an idea of what that question might be. "Uhh, thanks Fiona, I'll be Ok now." He ran up the stairs and into the bathroom before she could ask anything.  
  
Could it be that she knew? First Moonbay, and now Fiona. Perhaps Rudolph had no choice but to tell Van how he felt tonight, cos if he didn't, maybe one of them would. He slipped back into his clothes, and dithered around the room, unsure of what to do. Five minutes later, he heard the door opening and the voices of Van and Moonbay. Realizing he couldn't hide forever, he gingerly stepped out and down the stairs.  
  
---  
  
Meanwhile over by the Command Wolf, Irvine had awoken.  
  
"I wonder why I've woken up, judging from the moons I'd say the night was still young, well whatever, might as well head back to sleep again then. " He went to roll over. "What the, I can't move! My whole body has gone numb, what's going on?!"  
  
"Oh Irrrrvine hee hee hee, looksh like me and you are going to have ssome fun! "  
  
Oh no! NOOOoooooo.....  
  
----  
  
Much to the delight of Rudolph, Moonbay had promptly kicked the boys out of the room downstairs once again, so she could get some sleep. Here he was, alone with Van in the bedroom. Just thinking about it felt so good, but what to do.....what to do.  
  
"So....What happened to Stinger?"  
  
"Well I'm glad you asked. After he had attempted to humiliate you, I realized that he was just trying to provoke everyone around him, and so I decided to play it cool. Knowing that his taunting wasn't working, he left saying he was about to have a wild time with some other guy. Heh, as if anyone would believe that."  
  
The story would have been most interesting to Rudolph, if he had listened to a single word of it. No, he was much more mesmorized about the way Van had been removing his clothing piece by piece. First it was his socks and shoes, then it was his upper garments, and now he was taking off his pants. Rudolph was almost drooling, and realized he needed to say something in response, something long, so that he would have an excuse for looking in his direction.  
  
"Huhaha, good one Van." Well that wasn't very long, Rudolph chuckled to himself, but it didn't matter too much, Van was now down to his boxers, black boxers with white polka dots. What a sight! Starting to blush, he forced himself to turn away and looked out of the window considering what his next move should be. He noticed that there wasn't a single light on in any of the nearby houses. "Good, doesn't look like there is going to be anymore distractions tonight."  
  
"Awesome!" sighed Van happily. "Look's like we'll be able to sleep in peace tonight eh." He sat onto the floor, and then tilted back into a sleeping position, leaving the whole bed for Rudolph. "Wow, this fluffy pink carpet feels better than my sleeping bag. Ahhh, well, goodnight Rudolph."  
  
"G...goodnight Van, sleep well." Oh no! Van was starting to fall asleep, thoughts started screaming through Rudolph's head. If he didn't act now he wouldn't get a second chance, they would never be alone together like this again, not with Fiona around, and especially not if he was to become Emperor. It had to be tonight, it had to be now. He could hear a voice inside his head: 'Do something Rudolph, do it now!....now!....NOW!!!'  
  
"V...V.....Van?"  
  
No response.  
  
".......Van?" Oh no, had he been too late.  
  
"What's up Rudolph." The voice sounded rather groggy.  
  
"It's...it's just that ermm........" Was this really such a good idea, Van would never be interested in him.  
  
"Huh? I didn't quite hear what you said."  
  
Prozen! He would use it against him, the empire would be in chaos. Perhaps he should keep quiet. But no, no wait, he was in love, he wanted nothing more than to be with Van, nothing else mattered. Besides, Prozen need not find out about this, yes, this was the right thing to do. Even if Van didn't feel the same way about him, it's not as if he would go and tell anyone about it, Van wasn't like that. And at least if he asked, at least this way, there would be no regrets, he would know one way or the other...  
  
With renewed courage, but still nervous about Van's response, Rudolph decided to take the plunge.  
  
"I love you, Van." The words seem to echo around the room, it was like time had frozen still at that moment. He felt his heart beating through the roof, but then it slowed down a little.  
  
".....Van?"  
  
There was a deadly stillness, and then came a response. A response in the form of a snoring sound. The sound, the noise, repeated itself again, and again, and again. He was too late.....too slow.  
  
A tear rolled down Rudolph's cheek, as he slowly walked towards the bed. With each step, his body seemed to feel heavier than before. He crawled into the bed, under the covers, and lay there motionless. It seemed like the whole world had stopped, and his whole life had come to an end. All was silent and motionless, all except the snoring, a constant reminder of his wasted chance.  
  
The End  
  
------  
  
Alas.....sorry if the ending was a bit disapppointing, perhaps there will be a sequel or something in the future...  
  
  
  
"What are you talking about?! No! This isn't over, I'm not giving up, not yet! I won't! Get out of my head. I will find a way to tell Van tonight, somehow I will!"  
  
........What the???....I thought I had full control over this story.....guess not.....looks like there's more to come after all. 


	6. Risk

It's Chapter 6, yes, there is indeed a Chapter 6, hope nobody left the fic at Chapter 5 never to return again, that wasn't really the end, just a red herring.  
  
Anyway, here we go:  
  
---  
  
Rudolph lay curled up under the covers for what seemed like hours. He listened to the faint snores, it was as if they were tormenting him, making fun of him. He clutched his hands over his ears, how long was this going to go on for, would he have to lay awake all night listening to it. Voices echoed through his head. They echoed over and over again, and there was something about them, they felt quite different from his normal thoughts...  
  
'Noooooooooo' 'AAAAACK! ' 'I. think. I'm. going. to. faint. ' 'Please don't stop there. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease.'  
  
'Please continue ' 'It scares me. Tee-hee.' 'You can not end it like that! it would be cruel and injustice! ' 'By Zi, if you had dared to stop it there...Don't stop. Please don't.'  
  
Rudolph suddenly sprung upright, the covers falling off of him. The voices were right! He looked down to his heart, and realized that they had been coming from there. He was all ready to give up, but the voices gave him new hope, told him otherwise. Perhaps there was still a way! Nooo, no, no, what was he thinking, Van interested in Rudolph, there was no way in a million years....he liked Fiona, he was mad about Fiona.  
  
But then again, why had Van been talking to Fiona whilst he was in the shower, why were the two of them on the landing, just outside the door? And what about Stinger, who said that Van was just like him, he saw it in his eyes? And on the Gustav, Van had put an arm around him, could he have been awake the whole time?  
  
ENOUGH! Rudolph yelled inside of himself, he was tired of all of this questioning, all of the guesswork. So annoying! Whichever way Van felt, the empire would not be affected, he had already considered that. And the only other thing mattered to him was that he loved Van, all other thoughts could just go to hell. If Van felt otherwise then so be it, it would be better than guessing for the rest of his life. Tonight is the night, tonight is the night, tonight is the night!!  
  
Rudolph slowly took off his uniform, why not, Van had done the same after all. When he was down to his boxers, blue with rubber duckies, he went over to Van, and stopped at his side. He felt his hands shaking, his whole body shaking, and strolled back towards the bed. Perhaps there was a somewhat more tactful approach, or perhaps something even better......sleepwalking! A perfect excuse if Van freaked out! Yeah that was a good idea. He stood there for a few seconds, trying his best to look like a zombie, and slowly began advancing towards Van, step by step, step by step. Van suddenly rolled over on the pink carpet, and Rudolph, in fright, leaped back onto the bed and under the covers.  
  
Did Van see him. The sound of snoring told him otherwise. Whew. No wait, that's not good. Darn it! He needed a way to wake Van up. A voice told him to give up, but he quickly dismissed it. He had to know how Van felt. "Well, well if Van can snore, then so can I," he spoke out loud, in frustration.  
  
And so he started snoring loudly, attempting to wake Van up. It seemed futile, and after a while it felt like he was playing a game, trying to imitate Van's every move, his every snore. His plan wasn't working though, and he cursed himself for being so timid. Maybe if he dug up all the courage that he had. One more snore, he told himself, one more, this time a really loud one. Unfortunately, loud snores are hard to achieve, and Rudolph stuttered half way, resulting in a very loud, and very weird noise. Sheesh, this was ridiculous, Rudolph felt silly, was it really so hard to wake him up and say a few words, they were just 'words' after all. Suddenly, from out of nowhere, he heard Van mumble something to himself.  
  
"Whoa, Rudolph, you sure know how to let one rip, I wouldn't be surprised if the whole colony had heard that." Surely he hadn't meant.....  
  
"No V..van, I didn't do one of those!" Rudolph responded hastily. He immediately wished that he hadn't.  
  
"Your awake?!.............I don't get it, what was that sound then?"  
  
Rudolph was in disbelief, he had wanted Van awake but not like this. Quick, think of an excuse! He wracked his brains, but nothing came to him. The truth?.........No way! About 30 seconds had passed.......had Van gone back to sleep again?! A second chance slipping away?  
  
"Van?!"  
  
"......eh?"  
  
He couldn't fall back to sleep again, not after this far.  
  
"I.....I...um deliberately woke you up!" Rudolph felt his heart picking up speed rapidly, was there any way of turning back now?  
  
Van's voice suddenly jumped to attention. "What for? What is it Rudolph?! Has something happened to Fiona? Zeke? Don't tell me, Stinger's come back for more?"  
  
"No Van, nothing like that." Rudolph stared into his eyes, one last look of those eyes, one last look at the face, such a handsome face.  
  
"Oh?" Van looked confused. "What's going on then?"  
  
"Its just that I.....it's just that.....I......"  
  
"Something bad 'has' happened, hasn't it?!  
  
"No, it's nothing bad, at least I don't think........" Rudolph's eyes began to well up, so much pressure!  
  
"Your talking in riddles Rudolph, if it's not bad, then what?......And why are you looking at me like that?"  
  
"........I........I......."  
  
"C'mon Rudolph, your scaring me!"  
  
"....I'm in love with you Van!" The six words shot out of his mouth, he couldn't believe he had said it, he had actually said it.  
  
The room filled with silence.  
  
Oh shit, what had he done! There was no way Van was asleep this time, his eyes were open, and they were staring directly at him. His face, it looked so shocked! He should have listened to those hesitating thoughts, but no, no he had to go and reveal his innermost feelings. What had he been thinking?. Stupid Rudolph. Stupid, stupid Rudolph. He began to sob, and pulled the covers over his head, as both an attempt to drown out any noise he might make, and to escape Van's haunting eyes.  
  
"Rudolph.....I'm sorry....I just.....I just don't feel the same way........" Oh crap, this really was going from bad to worse. The end. It was the end of his life. He felt the covers suffocating him, air running out, time spiralling out of conrol.  
  
Bang bang! Game over.  
  
"Y..y..your crying?.........Don't cry Rudolph." Van got up and walked towards him. He placed an arm on the covers, onto his shoulders. " It's not that I.......  
  
I um..........  
  
I err.........  
  
Oh heck! I lied.....I do feel the same way."  
  
Rudolph's eyes shot open at those last words. He slowly lifted the blankets over him, and looked into Van's eyes. They were right in front of him, so close. "Your not just saying that out of pity, are you?"  
  
"I'm so sorry, forgive me for scaring you like that, I was scared of the consequences. But Rudolph, I DO feel the same way. There is something about your personality, the way you want everything to be fair, the way you laugh, the way you smile, everything about you. I bet you'd sacrifice your life, so that the empire could be in good hands."  
  
"Well that's not exactly true, I am jeapordizing the whole empire right now, by telling you this." Rudolph responded, chuckling in relief. What Van had just said.....It felt like some hand had reached inside of him, and pulled out all the bad stuff, leaving his heart free to beat all over his body.  
  
"I guess so, but one thing IS a fact, you would sacrifice your life for 'me'. I saw that yesterday when I was down and out, and you tried to save me with Irvine's Command Wolf, even though the odds were stacked against you. Not only that, sometime before then, you came looking for me when I was feeling down, nobody else did, only you Rudolph, only you. Is it any wonder I'm in love with you!"  
  
He couldn't believe his ears, was he daydreaming? Yeah, he was, Van was still asleep. No wait, the snoring had gone, and Van was right there......right there, in his boxers......squatting right beside him. Surely this wasn't real! Lips pressing against his cheek shook all his doubts away. He laughed inside at all the attempts he had made trying to tell Van, and was so glad that he followed his heart. This all felt so good, like some sort of miracle had occured that only happens to other people. A miracle that he wasn't going to waste. He kissed Van back on the cheek, and then on the lips. Van grinned sheepishly, and pulled back the covers, tired of squatting on the floor.  
  
"Rubber duckies, hahaha!"  
  
Rudolph turned bright red.  
  
"You know, I've always wanted to say this to you Rudolph. You are sooo cute!"  
  
Rudolph's face managed to turn an even brighter shade of red. Then they both giggled about it, and Van hopped into the bed beside him and kissed him once again. There were just No words to describe how Rudolph was feeling anymore.  
  
"You know what?" Van said, wrapping his arm under Rudolph's neck. "We can be like this forever and ever, I'm going to come to the palace every weekend, as your personal Zoid trainer. It's the perfect excuse!"  
  
"Huhu-haha, huhu-haha, that is indeed the perfect excuse." Rudolph smirked, tickling Van's chest.  
  
Van tickled him back, and they both started laughing hysterically. Suddenly there was a sharp bang on the door, followed by Moonbay's voice.  
  
"Quit fooling around in there, some of us are trying to get to sleep you know!"  
  
"Aheh, sorry Moonbay." Van called out, and then turned to Rudolph. "Guess we better call it a night, wouldn't want to risk us getting caught together."  
  
"Not if we want all those weekends at the palace." Rudolph winked, snuggling up against Van. And there he slept, as happy as can be.  
  
The End  
  
------  
  
Hope you enjoyed!  
  
And if your wondering what happened to Irvine, there's going to be an entire fic covering that ("Irvines Love"), starting Spring Break, until then byebye, and thank you so much for reading! 


End file.
